1. Set rack in middle of oven and preheat to 350º.
2. Bring a pot of water to a boil, then remove from heat and place a heat-proof bowl (that means metal or glass) on top. Break up 4 sticks butter and all the chocolate into the bowl. Stir occasionally until melted and combined, creating the shiniest and most gorgeous buttery melted chocolate, then remove the bowl from pot and set aside to cool.
3. In another bowl, whisk together 8 large eggs, ½ teaspoon salt, 2 cups of firmly packed brown sugar, 2 cups of granulated sugar, and 1 tablespoon of vanilla extract.
4. Stir cooled chocolate butter into egg mixture, then fold in 2 cups of flour. Mix it all together now! (She should be inappropriately THICK.)
5. Grab a rimmed 12×18″ sheet pan. Two 13×9″ pans could also work. Butter her up and line with parchment. (Trust me, you need the extra help getting these out of the pan. Don’t skip this step). Spread batter evenly into pan.
6. Bake in preheated 350º oven for one hour. Look for a shiny top and moderately firm batter. Let cool completely on a rack.
7. Once cooled, use parchment to move brownies to a cutting board. Cut off edges all around, then eat edges immediately. Cut the rest of the brownies into gorgeous thick and chewy squares and CRY.
8. Pour yourself a glass of milk and enjoy the best brownie experience known to (wo)man.
9. Place brownies in an airtight container or wrap in plastic wrap and store room temperature. You can also wrap them tightly in plastic wrap and freeze for later.

Recipe can be halved. 

*Gluten free All Purpose 1:1 flour can be used.